Assalaamu Alaykum wr wb dearest beloved sisters,
We make duaa all are well in sha Allah.
Was just thinking about how many times we are just….right there— on the brink of a break through, on the brink of becoming better, on the brink of… establishing a good habit, and then suddenly we do something out of impatience or maybe we were deceived by ourselves, our negative thinking, or something or someone else.
Dear sisters, if we could just imagine that the moment we are about to give in and give up or take steps backwards….. is really the moment we’re about to break through and make it.
Once I was trying to lose a few pounds and the scale wasn’t moving…for weeks, nothing. So, I said oh well, it’s not moving let me just enjoy something sweet for a change. Well, it moved alright — the wrong way 🙂 So then I felt worse. I had to work hard to remotivate myself. I had to take negative feelings and somehow miraculously make them positive so I could benefit and not self sabotage more. Little did my impatient self want to accept that weight loss isn’t linear; it doesn’t drop mathematically. Sometimes our bodies just need a moment to catch up and readjust. But … I didn’t care. I just wanted the scale to move and when I didn’t get my way – I made bad choices. I was just right there.
Imagine for a moment… we are climbing a hill. Us together. You say to me, let’s not give up. We’re almost there. I think yeah right, look up there, we can’t even see the top. I think I’m not fit enough, good enough for this kind of climb. Then you say no no, it’s just there – come on, we’re going together. Then I say, I can’t see it, I’m just going to stop or go back.
You keep trudging along and reach the top as you reach the top, the most amazing world opens up – beauty and perspective you couldn’t have dreamt of. You can only try to tell me about it. But as for me, I’m just sitting down below somewhere or maybe I turned around even. I was just…right there. But I gave up when I was just about there.
And this ilmi climb is worth it dear sisters….. we’re here together. This is a climb worth more than this deficient one can comprehend. We look to our akaabir and hear their amazing words of encouragement and love. Wisdom pours forth from the wells of their pure hearts. And we cling to all we are taught because we hear them all telling us, keep on, we’re just right there, it’s not far. They tell us where to step, and we follow their lead as they coax us towards the good in this world and in the Hereafter.
Climbs are not easy, but dear sisters, it’s just a day or part of a day. in sha Allah we’re climbing towards khayr/goodness. in sha Allah.
May Allah swt make us helpers to one another and put love among all. aameen.
love and duas, walaikum salaam ma’al ikraam